The 3 “C’s” of Leading with Confidence

It is the rare human being who can maintain confidence 100% of the time. Even the best of leaders experience dips in confidence from time to time, from context to context and from situation to situation.

 

The key is building your ‘confidence’ muscles.

I believe confidence can be cross-contextual. By that I mean having success in one area of life can be used as a reference point from which we can borrow confidence while we build it in that new area of our personal or professional life.

To raise the bar on your confidence as a leader, I’d like you to offer you 3 concepts to focus that can provide a roadmap for creating higher levels of confidence in whatever endeavor you are embarking on, and especially in your role as a leader:

Certainty – Certainty is defined as the state of being free from doubt or reservation, destined, sure to happen, inevitable, bound to come. Certainty is how confidence is projected by leaders and it’s a skill that also has to be developed along with confidence. Certainty comes from experience and through developing your beliefs and values about yourself, your role as a leader, the world, your organization, the marketplace, etc. One of the key skills to nurture to develop your level of certainty is perspicacity or a keenness of mental perception and discernment, which helps in decision-making and problem solving.

Clarity – Many years ago I attended a workshop by Anthony Robbins and one of the most powerful things he said that day I’ll never forget. His message was “clarity is power.” I’ve learned over the years that is a very true statement. Without clarity its tough to see where you are going and a leader without clarity is not much of a leader.

There are many contexts a in which leader needs clarity, which can be overwhelming.  This is why I want to start at home by having you focus on key areas first to build your confidence and certainty as a leader:

• Your Leadership “Identity”
• Your Strengths
• Your Areas for Growth and Development
• Your Team Strengths and Talents

Capability – This is defined as having power and ability, being efficient and competent. And, there are six fundamental areas leaders need to not just be capable but must master:

• Influencing communication skills
• Visionary thinking
• Decision-making
• Problem-solving
• Delegation
• Emotional Mastery
__________________

This is a guest post by Skip Weisman, The Leadership & Workplace Communication Expert. He helps organizational leaders create high performing, positive work environments with teams of employees who communicate effectively, work successfully together in teams, and who love what they do as they contribute to their organization’s overall purpose. His company, Weisman Success Resources, Inc. is based in Poughkeepsie, NY. You may contact him directly with any questions, or for a complimentary Strategy Session at 845-463-3838 or e-mail to Skip@WeismanSuccesResources.com


This post was featured in the That Girl Is Funny.

Five Animals Teach Us Less-wasteful Dining Habits

Feeling frugal?  Wondering how to save some money and time, while still eating healthy and helping the environment?  Here are five animals showing us ways to eat less wastefully, saving time and money, while helping our health and the environment.

The Fox
Saves: money, environment, health
Lesson: Buy direct from the source

By the time you buy a dozen eggs at the grocery store, they have been through several hands…and at least two weeks of handling, often three.  By the time you finish that last egg, it might already be four weeks old.  Not very fresh.

The fox goes straight to the source – the henhouse.  No middlemen adding extra prices.  No back-and-forth-between-between-companies transportation adding extra pollution.  No warehouse lay-overs reducing freshness.  In many cases, no (or less) chemicals and hormones polluting your meal.

Pretty foxy strategy.

The Giraffe
Saves: money
Lesson: Check for cheaper items

Stores always place in front of your face the items that yield the biggest profits.  These are the very things that a frugal-minded person least wants to be coaxed into buying.

The giraffe looks for less-obvious alternatives.  His long neck reaches for higher leaves and items tucked out of sight on the top shelves.

Always stretch your neck a little to see if you can find a less-costly option.

The Bear
Saves: money, time, environment
Lesson: Buy in bulk

Many people buy the same items week after week.  This makes sense for milk and eggs; they would spoil if you buy them months in advance.  But for many things, it makes no sense to make hundreds of trips to buy the same thing.

The bear shops bulk.  He doesn’t flit from flower to flower to collect honey; he waits for the bees to gather the nectar and churn out huge quantity of honey.  This way, the bear needs go only once to collect a huge amount of honey all at once.  When we do this, the item usually costs less, and we save time, money and pollution by reducing transportation.

Yeah – let someone else do the work.

READ ALSO: Three animals search high and low for a deal

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The Spider
Saves: money, time, environment, health
Lesson: Eat in

People seem to be eating out more and more.  But restaurant food is usually much more fat-laden, sugar-stuffed and salt-infused than food made at home.  It also costs much more.  And it often takes longer to eat, when you consider transportation time, preparation and the inevitable waiting-for-the-bill ritual.

The spider never eats out.  He waits for food to come to him, prepares it and devours it on the spot.  He saves time, money and the risk of getting squished by a boot.

Eat in and enjoy the privacy and the savings.

The Squirrel
Saves: money, time
Lesson:Buy when there’s a surplus

We buy things all year ’round, even things that could last quite a while. Apples and squashes are plentiful and cheap in the Fall, but keep well in a cool corner of the basement or garage for months.  Some items are overstocked after Christmas.  These are the times to buy.

The squirrel does most of his shopping when the nuts are plentiful, then stores them away to eat over the course of the winter.  This saves a lot of time that otherwise would be spent running around looking for food.

Why run from store to store, when the store can be right at home?

Merci pour l’année – Thanks for the year

When I was in consumer advocacy, essentially a combination lobbyist and public relations function, I used to say that “thank you” is the most important thing you can say to influence people. It’s not when you are approaching somebody for a favor that you win his heart; it is when you are appreciating what he has done.  And this is a universal sentiment that applies to all facets of life, all manner of people and all situations you will find yourself in. Everybody, from the President in his executive suite to the guy whose boot is stuck in the mud a few feet below the oil slick in the Gulf, appreciates being appreciated.

We teach the value of expressing thanks to our daughters, too.  And hopefully some of the message will stick with them over the years.

In the meantime,this is the thank you card my younger daughter prepared for her teachers this year…

Something about the colors and the balance of shapes spoke to me, so I thought I would share it with you.

Random thoughts about smiles

Want to improve your face value? Smile more often. Here are four thoughts about smiles, just in case you need motivation to smile a little more often.  read them.  Enjoy them.  You can even smile at them, if you wish.

When they say someone was “wearing nothing but a smile”, that might be bad news for garment manufacturers, but it is wonderful news for humanity. A smile is the most important thing a person can wear. It is somewhat ironic that so many more people wear clothes than wear smiles. Perhaps we have misplaced priorities.

Be your own florist. You know how flowers brighten up a room? Just like a smile? In fact, flowers also brighten up people’s faces…causing them to smile more, too.

Want to brighten up a room? Smile more, and you will be your own florist.

Smiling Poem
Don’t cry when something is over
Don’t cry for the loss.
Smile because it happened,
Smile for what once was.

If you ever doubted the power of a smile, see this testimony as how much easier it is to make a sale when you smile:
http://thesalesblog.com/2010/05/smile-power-an-open-letter-to-tom-peters/

But smiling is not just for making sales.  If a smile can make a sale, imagine how good it can be at making a friend.

Funny Stories of Humor and Satire

Welcome to my Humor and Satire Collection: articles that are supposed to be funny.Your challenge is to find one that really makes you laugh, then forward it to a friend to share the laughter.

Here they are, my humorous stories in no particular order (which is also kind of funny, don’t you think?)

The Art of Kissing
Kissing is the world’s favorite participation sport. Find out why.

Hotel Jokes Haunt My Nightmares
I used to lie awake in a lot of hotel rooms. Now I still lie awake remembering them.

Help with statistics
So many statistics. So many truths. Which ones are just stories?

Butterfly Crossing

An adventure in facial hair
See what happens when I grow a funny beard.

It’s a Sick Household
We do things as a family. That’s why we all get sick at once.

Vitamin Supplements in a Liquid World
It’s a worldwide liquidation, from soap to vitamins.

I am a Grinch
Funny how, by NOT wanting a present, I am a Grinch. That’s what I call humor.

What?!? No Bananas?
Find out how bananas and traffic both cast a glimpse of how expectations affect our happiness.

Hippo Rage (controlling rage)
Give up all hope of anger management when face to face with “hippo rage”.

That’s the Christmas Spirit
Is there a wrong way to keep the Christmas spirit all year long?

Clowns

A Bad Hairdresser Day
Why are hairdressers never held accountable for baldness growing in their care?

How NOT to Stop Bad Breathby David Leonhardt
There is a right way and a wrong way to stop bad breath. Guess which is funnier.

Flea Market-ing Lessons
Just what did The Happy Guy learn selling his books at the flea market?

My Career as a Hermit
Writers, stay-at-home parents and online marketing geeks – stories of a hermit.

The Pajamas Fashion Primer
If you work from home, you’ll need this fashion primer.

Work-from-home Office Policies
Why should “office workers” have all the fun? This is your policy manual for the home office.

Aging Gracefully (You’re How Old?!?)
Discover the shocking truth about aging gracefully, now and in the past.

Tiger and the Three Pigs (improving self-esteem)
A modern-day fairy tale about improving self-esteem, self-image and self-actualization.

Country Living Explained
City folk just don’t ‘get’ the country. Funny, this story won’t help one bit.

Hurry Up and procrastinate
Three cheers for the last minute … may it rest in peace.

Bigfoot CrossingGrassophobia
We can learn about overcoming our own fears by watching children overcome theirs.

Give generously and sleep better
Givers sleep better at night, right? Or do they?

Sharing The Happy Jar
A little extra effort can make a big difference. Make it personal.

Cleaned Up or Cleaned Out?
Wrestle with the anguishing question of when to give and when to protect yourself.

When Mother Comes to Visit
Just when Mom comes to visit, the house looks like a hurricane wandered through.

By Now, I’m a Expert at Memory Loss
Memory loss is common as we age, but The Happy Guy has discovered a surprising cause.

Painful Lessons from the Maternity Ward (our child-birth story)
Where has all the humor in childbirth gone? This is a funny story…honest!

How to tell if you are a literary snob
A humorous look at titles, status and self-actualization stories.

Mr. Cheapie’s Frugal Dining Tips
Learn how to save big money eating out at restaurants.

Mr. Cheapie’s Frugal Shopping Tips
Learn how to save big money while shopping.

Investing as a Sport
A humorous look at what the bears and bulls do to reduce our daily joy.

Foolproof Customer Service Strategies
A humorous story about customer service strategies that can’t possibly work.

Home of the Year
Discover what it takes to have the Home of the Year.

Unique Gift Ideas for the 21st Century
Before buying anybody a facelift for their birthday, read this!

The Surprising Value of Vultures
Humor: Even vultures have value.

My Book Contains “No Artificial Growth Hormones”
Satire: The Happy Guy wants to copy a biotech giant to hit it big.

Plastic Recycling Confusionby David Leonhardt
Why is it so hard to simply pollute a little less?

Happiness is … recycling dirty diapers
There’s more than one way to be happy in harmony with the environment.

Funny clowns in carSilver Linings Are Everywhere
A satirical look at the true story of how Viagra is helping the environment.

Extreme Fatigue Perpetuitis
Half humor, half deadly serious: learn about extreme fatigue.

The Official Pumpkin Cheesecake Recipe for Parenting
Having trouble following a recipe while parenting? This recipe is tailor-made for you.

Top Ten Tools for Writing Humor
Want to write a humor column? Here are ten tips from a humor columnist.

Squish, Climb, Splash: A Family Adventure Vacation
Humorous stories from vacationland.

Tearing Down The House
Learn the importance of time management through this home improvement project.

The Secret Weapon to Beat SARS
Find out how reducing stress can help you defeat disease and illness.

Leadership Secrets from Foreign Penguins
Want self-actualization success? Learn how six penguins achieved their goals using team leadership.

Beware radical mint enthusiasts
Jelly Beans and Toothpaste battle it out for flavor superiority.

No Happiness Without Patience
Instant gratification is out. Patience is in…and so are cavemen, in this humorous lesson.

Thank you for visiting The Happy Guy’s Humor and Satire Collection. We love to share our joy with others.

Pamper Yourself

OK, time to pamper yourself. I mean, if you’ve been working hard to be a better person, to be friendlier and fitter and more generous and more efficient and make whatever improvements you feel you need, take a few moments to pamper yourself. Find something that is in sync with the changes you have made in your life (If you’ve decided to eat healthy from now on, a triple fudge sundae is NOT the right means to pamper yourself).

Pick something that makes you feel special and worthwhile. Perhaps it’s a spa treatment. Perhaps a few hours in a quiet place away from the chaos of kids and the chores of home. It might just be a hot bath with soothing music.  Or it might be cranking up the volume and playing air guitar.  Whatever it is that makes you feel special, do it.

You are special. You have been working hard and making improvements every day. You do deserve it. So go ahead and pamper yourself.  Your self will thank you with all your heart.

From today’s Daily Dose of Happiness.

Do you Personalize?

Anybody can outsource their greeting cards or birthday cakes. But what a statement of love it is to labor over these symbols yourself, in person, with your own hands!

Do you buy greeting cards for the people closest to you? Why not make them instead? Oh, sure, you won’t create a work of art or make some witty saying like those store-bought greeting cards. But it’s not for art or wit that you are giving the card, right?

A hand-made card shows that you took the time to do something special for your loved one. Let me repeat that with the right emphasis: A hand-made card shows that YOU took the time to do something special for your loved one.

You wouldn’t outsource your hugs. You wouldn’t outsource your hand shakes. You wouldn’t outsource your kisses or your smiles or your phone calls. These are all personal expressions of your feelings toward other people and they are the very last things you would outsource.

Greeting cards are also supposed to be personal expressions of your affection for somebody else. Don’t outsource your greeting cards to some factory somewhere. Make your own and show that they really do come from the heart. From your heart.

Taken from today’s Daily Dose of Happiness.

Update June 2013: It’s not just the greeting cards. It can be any token of your appreciation, love or esteem for a person. A week ago, we set this cake on fire for our eldest daughter:

Campfire cake - a cake on fire!

It was not the first time we went all-out on cakes. We’ve done castles and waterfalls and once we did the Sorting Hat of Harry Potter fame. But it does not have to be so fancy; it just has to be personal.

ENERGIZE!

Want to feel more energized and less stressed? Perhaps you spend a lot of time in front of the computer screen, the TV or some other screen. Here are a few ways to feel energized.

The most obvious is to stop spending so much time in front of a screen. OK, not always practical, but worth a try every now and then.

So get up during commercials or every half hour and stretch.  It’s the least you can do, and it will make your screen time more enjoyable, as well.

In fact, get up and do some aerobic exercise, even just for 30 seconds. Jumping jacks. Dance. Fast-paced push-ups. Skip rope. Run up and down the stairs, as I often do. Anything.

Every few minutes move your eyes away from the screen. Roll your eyes up, to the left, to the right, but most importantly, focus them on something closer and also on something farther than the screen.  In fact, roll your head, as well.  Give your eyes a break and your neck a stretch.

Force a yawn. Stretching your face will boost that energy and reduce that stress.  Stretch it wide and – oops – it’s hard to fake a yawn without a real one coming on.

Energize!

Happiness on FaceBook

Have you seen this Facebook app to support the positive psychology  exercise “Three Good Things”?  Participants in this exercise record  Three Good Things, and the reasons why they happen, every day. There  are some other versions of this exercise out there (including an  iPhone app and one on happier.com), but this is a way to make these exercises more effective using social interaction.

This app is at http://apps.facebook.com/threegoodthings/, but the page with  more info is at http://www.facebook.com/apps/application.php?id=119352832576&v=info. It is free to use, but because it is research, they ask participants to complete very brief surveys after 1 week, 1 month, 3 months, and 6  months of use.

This could be a great way to spread your own happiness.