Our Happiness Level

I was listening to Hay House Radio yesterday, and the host was talking about how our happiness levels could be measured by averaging the happiness levels of our top few friends. I found this so interesting and also very eye opening.

It’s so important to surround ourselves with positive, emotionally healthy, and happy people. Because emotions and feelings are contagious (here is my previous post about this), it’s especially important and crucial for our own well being that we are cognizant of who we choose to be close to.

And I know that this isn’t always the easiest decision to make. Sometimes you’ll find that you’ve been friends with someone for years – you have a history that you would feel bad letting go of. And yet… every time you are with this friend you find that you start off in a happy mood (your mood), and you leave in a negative, sad mood (their mood). It’s crucial to your own happiness to carefully choose who you spend time with. If someone doesn’t help elevate your mood or make you feel great – it may be best to spend less time with them in the future.

And I’m not talking about a dear friend who has had a bad day and needs to vent (we’ve all been there). I’m talking about the person who continuously sees life through a darkened lens – who sees each experience through their negative filter. And while you may love them and want the best for them, you can also love yourself and want the best for your own well being and happiness.

rose colored glassesOn the positive side – think about your friends who radiate happiness. Think about how wonderful you feel after you spend time with them. Filling your life with people like this will actually help increase your own happiness!

And it doesn’t just have to be your friends – you can read positive books and blogs (like this one!), listen to inspirational podcasts, watch television shows that are happy and fun – anything you can think of to raise your own happiness level.

And in doing so, everyone who comes in contact with you will also have their own happiness levels raised.
It’s definitely worth thinking about. Your happiness is that important.

Jodi Chapman writes Soul Speak – a daily blog focusing on going within, being grateful, and living positively. She is the bestselling author of the Soulful Journals series – writing-prompt journals that help you go within and get to know yourself better. She is also the author of the upcoming book, Go For It: Get Out There and Start Living! She believes that our thoughts become our reality, and our actions lead us to our dreams. She is happily married to her best friend and co-writer, Dan Teck. They live in southern Oregon with their fuzzy kids. www.soulspeakbyjodi.com


  1. Hi,
    I really like our post. I am so agreeing with you. I used to be happy with any friends. Now I’m making those friends that are closest to me and I spend the most time with, positive and emotionally healthy friends. thanks so much for this post. Sally

  2. I agree that it is ok to let go of relationships that no longer serve us. I believe that many don’t do this because they are afraid that they will never have any friends.

    The truth is that the Universe abhors a vacuum so as soon as soon as a relationship ends a new one will open.

  3. Many thanks to David for sharing my post! 🙂
    Sally and Justin – thank you for your heartfelt comments. I’m so glad you enjoyed my post.
    Justin – I completely agree with you that the universe will open up in ways we can’t even imagine once we decide to take that leap of faith and consciously choose our friends. It’s amazing how it happens!
    Sally – So glad to hear you’re choosing friends who are positive and emotionally healthy! It makes hanging out with them so much more enjoyable! 🙂

  4. I was recently living with a friend of 34 years. She was very miserable and I could see it starting to rub off on me as well as everyone else living in the house. I have moved to a more happier environment. I can totally see and feel the difference. Although we are not friends anymore after 34 years it hurts. But I beleave this move is better for me and my 5yr old daughter. Thank you for the reassurance that leaving was the best thing for us.

  5. Hey Jodi,

    Yes, it’s so true that we become just like the people that we spend the most time with. Not only is your happiness levels affected, but also your levels of success and financial abundance as well.

    It’s crucial that you align yourself with positive, successful people to raise your own potential.

  6. Hi Bobbie,
    Thanks so much for writing. I really feel for you and know how hard it can be to leave a friendship that has been such a large part of your life for so many years. I applaud your strength to move forward toward your ideal life. I have a weekly column on my blog called Ask Away where I answer reader’s questions. Last week’s was about leaving toxic friends and forming a new social circle. If you would like to read it, here is the link: http://www.jodichapman.com/2011/08/26/askawaysocialcircle/
    I truly wish you the best.

    Andrew – thank you for your thoughtful comments!
    You’re absolutely right that our “attraction muscles” contract or expand depending on who we are surrounded by. Thank you for adding this important piece to the puzzle.

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