Dealing with Nit Pickers

Not everyone has the courage to be honest, straight-forward, and easy to deal with. In every situation, disagreement, or problem there are always two pictures; the “little” picture, how something is seen by one individual, and the much larger picture, how it is seen by everyone else involved.

Self-centered people cannot see the bigger picture. All they see are their own needs, wants, and desires. Their entire world revolves around them. When forced to fight for one of their desires they rationalize reality, make excuses, and attempt to get their way by nit picking and splitting hairs.

How many times have you been able to reason with an unreasonable person? The instant someone disagrees with them they dig in their heels, close their minds and begin to “yea but” everything said.

One absolute freedom everyone has is the freedom to be wrong. When we like someone we unconsciously enlarge their strengths and minimize their weaknesses. When we dislike someone we minimize their strengths and enlarge their weaknesses. Personal perceptions are modified by emotions, biases, and beliefs. This happens to everyone. It is that old saying, “Nothing is either good or bad … but thinking makes it so.”

For years I thought it was my responsibility, my higher calling, to straighten out the uninformed. We all know where that led. Hundreds of hours were lost trying to raise people’s awareness with logic and reason. Logic only works with logical people.

What I eventually learned to do with nit-picking and hair-splitting people is step away, knowing that their minds were closed and they would have to live with whatever they believed … not me.

Viewed from the much larger picture the nit-picking hair-splitting people are only sawing sawdust. So what? Life is too short to be little.


This was a Guest Post by Dick Warn, author of The Miracle Minute.

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