Poopified!

No, this is not a parenting post, although we did call our youngest one “The Poopasaurus” during the first six months of her lives.  In fact, this is an article of gratitude, based on personal experience.

Yikes!  While momentarily distracted by a bird flying over head, I was shocked by the loud “thud!” that wallopped my windshield.  Could it be hostile artillery from an invading Martian army?  Could it be that the sky was finally falling as Chicken Little had predicted?  Was the Jolly Green Giant eating a sandwich overhead and being just a tad to careless for my comfort?

Poopified!After nearly a quarter of a second (but seeming much longer), it dawned on me where the huge splatter of green goo came from (not peas from the Jolly Green Giant’s sandwich, I assure you).  I should note that the carefree and obviously not-quite-civilized bird did not hit my roof with his generosity, nor the hood of my car.  Nor the top, bottom, right side or center of my windshield, for that matter.  He dropped his gift right square in front of my face.  Point blank at twelve o-clock.

As the earth-shattering thud reverberated through my mind, it struck me just how powerful that birdy-poop was.  I mean, that certainly was a wallop.  And the obvious question also struck me:

“Just how badly would I have been injured if there had not been a windshield?  What if I had been standing in a field contemplating the bees in the flowers and with no warning whatsoever my head had been poopified?”

Of course, I am immensely grateful for the inventor of the windshield.  What a marvelous device. And all the folks who built this one. Good job, guys.  They saved me from having to learn the hard way the answer to my question about the birds and the bees and the bird poop.

I’ll bet you take your windshield for granted. I’ll bet you see right through it…and when you can’t see right through it, you probably have some choice words and splash some colored fluid across the surface to wipe away anything you can see.

But your windshield is like a guardian angel – not just because they are both invisible unless you look very hard – but because they both protect you.

Unless, of course, you don’t believe in windshields.

But even if you don’t see the windshield, and even if you don’t want to see the windshield, it is worth being grateful for it. And have you giving a moment to think about all the things you do see and want to see, much more obvious than a windshield, that also deserve your gratitude?

Seat belts come to mind. Tires. But also garden hoses. Ovens. Hats. Let’s not forget rubber boots when the sea level rises in the puddles. Telephones. Belts. Oh, so many items to be grateful for.

Hmm.  I wonder if there is a market for anti-bird umbrellas…

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