Eleven Life Lessons

April 21, 2011 by 4 Comments

This was passed on to me by my sister-in-law.  So much of it is just so true, great life lessons even for those of us who remember our school days as ancient history.

Bill Gates recently gave a speech at a High School about eleven (11) things they did not and will not learn in school.

 

Rule 1 : Life is not fair – get used to it!

Rule 2 : The world doesn’t care about your self-esteem. The world will expect you to accomplish something BEFORE you feel good about yourself.

Rule 3 : You will NOT make $60,000 a year right out of high school. You won’t be a vice-president with a car phone until you earn both.

Rule 4 : If you think your teacher is tough, wait till you get a boss

Rule 5 : Flipping burgers is not beneath your dignity. Your Grandparents had a different word for burger flipping: They called it opportunity.

Rule 6 : If you mess up, it’s not your parents’ fault, so don’t whine about your mistakes, learn from them.

Rule 7 : Before you were born, your parents weren’t as boring as they are now. They got that way from paying your bills, cleaning your clothes and listening to you talk about how cool you thought you were
So before you save the rain forest from the parasites of your parent’s generation, try delousing the closet in your own room..

Rule 8 : Your school may have done away with winners and losers, but life HAS NOT. In some schools, they have abolished failing grades and they’ll give you as MANY TIMES as you want to get the right answer. *This doesn’t bear the slightest resemblance to ANYTHING in real life.

Rule 9 : Life is not divided into semesters. You don’t get summers off and very few employers are interested in helping you FIND YOURSELF. *Do that on your own time.

Rule 10 : Television is NOT real life. In real life people actually have to leave the coffee shop and go to jobs.

Rule 11 : Be nice to nerds. Chances are you’ll end up working for one..

 

Filed Under: Happiness Tagged With: , , , ,

Be Prepared!

April 15, 2011 by 4 Comments

If you think only boy scouts and firefighters need to be prepared, consider these words by 19th century US Bishop Phillips Brooks:

“Some day, in years to come, you will be wrestling with the great temptation, or trembling under the great sorrow of your life. But the real struggle is here, now, in these quiet weeks. Now it is being decided whether, in the day of your supreme sorrow or temptation, you shall miserably fail or gloriously conquer. Character cannot be made except by a steady, long continued process.”

Every one of us will face challenges. Every one of us will be tested. Every one of will have choices to make, judgments to cast, and paths to choose that we can not even imagine at this point in lour lives. Today, you laid the groundwork for those challenges, those tests, those choices, those judgments – and yes, you laid the groundwork for those paths you cannot yet imagine. Tomorrow you will lay more groundwork. And the next day. And the day after that.

Everything you do is a building block for your future. Some things will happen that are way beyond your control.  Other things will happen because you are in control.  And how you carry yourself through all of them will determine who you are and what you stand for.

Follow your values today, and your values will guide you down the right path in times of stress – when that path you never imagined suddenly opens up before your feet.

Filed Under: Happiness

Treasure Your Memories

April 8, 2011 by 1 Comment

I wrote earlier about the first verse of Gary Allan’s “Tough Little Boys”, which has been ringing in my head this past little while. Today, I would like to skip to the third verse.

Here is the video once again, followed by the lyrics, followed by my comments.

Tough Little Boys – Video

Tough Little Boys – Lyrics

Well I never once
Backed down from a punch
Well I’d take it square on the chin
But I found out fast
That bullies just laugh
And we’ve got to stand up to them

So I didn’t cry when I got a black eye
As bad as it hurt, I just grinned
But when tough little boys grow up to be dads
They turn into big babies again.

Scared me to death
When you took your first steps
And I’d fall every time you fell down
Your first day of school, I cried like a fool
And I followed your school bus to town

Well I didn’t cry, when Old Yeller died
At least not in front of my friends
But when tough little boys grow up to be dads
They turn into big babies again

Well I’m a grown man
But as strong as I am
Sometimes its hard to believe
How one little girl, with little blonde curls
Could totally terrify me

If you were to ask, my wife would just laugh
She’d say “I know all about men
How tough little boys grow up to be dads
They turn into big babies again”

Well I know one day, I’ll give you away
But I’m gonna stand there and smile
But when I get home, and I’m all alone
Well, I’ll sit in your room for a while

Well I didn’t cry when Old Yeller died
At least not in front of my friends
But when tough little boys grow up to be dads
They turn into big babies again

When tough little boys grow up to be dads
They turn into big babies again

Tough Little Boys – Commentary

I must confess that I never followed the school bus to town. That is probably because we had the girls already in preschool, which we drove them to. But I did feel like following the bus and I did feel something of a loss.

Mostly, though, this verse makes me recall how our eldest would watch for us in the first year of kindergarten. She would get on the bus and the bus would drive off, then turn around in the parking lot just down the street and double back past our house. Sure as the sun sets in the west, our little girl would be watching out the window, eyes desperate and hungry for our wave. And if it was a rainy day, or I was distracted and it looked like maybe I was not giving my full attention to her when we waved, I would hear about it after school.

This is a memory I cannot forget. Every morning when I put the girls on the bus, our eldest still waves to us and watches (with a little less hunger in her eyes) for me to wave back. And every morning, I see that four-year old that waved with such hunger and need in her eyes.

This memory is precious.

It is important to hold tight to those memories that connect us with our past, with key elements of who we were before we became who we are. It’s important to remember the smiles and the trials, the moments of courage and strengths, the challenges that held us down, the times we pushed back…and how we felt and why we made the choices we did.

We won’t all put those memories into song, but it might be worth a try.

Filed Under: Happiness Tagged With: , , , , , ,

Don’t Back Down

April 7, 2011 by 2 Comments

This is Part One of a two-part discussion. Before you read my comments, you’ll want to be familiar with “Tough Little Boys”, a country song by Gary Allan that has been bouncing around in my head the past couple weeks. This is an extremely touching song that any parent will relate to, especially dads, but even my ten-year-old daughter gets it.

Here is the video, followed by the lyrics, followed by my comments.

Tough Little Boys – Video

Tough Little Boys – Lyrics

Well I never once
Backed down from a punch
Well I’d take it square on the chin
But I found out fast
That bullies just laugh
And we’ve got to stand up to them

So I didn’t cry when I got a black eye
As bad as it hurt, I just grinned
But when tough little boys grow up to be dads
They turn into big babies again.

Scared me to death
When you took your first steps
And I’d fall every time you fell down
Your first day of school, I cried like a fool
And I followed your school bus to town

Well I didn’t cry, when Old Yeller died
At least not in front of my friends
But when tough little boys grow up to be dads
They turn into big babies again

Well I’m a grown man
But as strong as I am
Sometimes its hard to believe
How one little girl, with little blonde curls
Could totally terrify me

If you were to ask, my wife would just laugh
She’d say “I know all about men
How tough little boys grow up to be dads
They turn into big babies again”

Well I know one day, I’ll give you away
But I’m gonna stand there and smile
But when I get home, and I’m all alone
Well, I’ll sit in your room for a while

Well I didn’t cry when Old Yeller died
At least not in front of my friends
But when tough little boys grow up to be dads
They turn into big babies again

When tough little boys grow up to be dads
They turn into big babies again

Tough Little Boys – Commentary

Today’s post is about the first paragraph, about the importance of standing up to bullies. I don’t think the typical adult is subjected to messages about bullying, and the bullying adults face is more subtle than with kids. Many people face bullying on the job that is harder to recognize as such than “Give me your lunch money or I’ll smash your brains into lizard spit!” More often, there is the underlying risk of losing one’s job or of being passed over for promotion if one doesn’t…

  • Work lots of extra hours
  • Fetch coffee for the boss
  • Sleep with the boss

I would like to think such occurrences are extremely rare, but I suspect they are somewhat more common than I would like.

Adults could learn from the kids’ messages, and sometimes it’s worth risking a job loss or promotion loss rather than a loss of dignity and self-esteem (I know, I know, this is not always an easy call).

I recall just four fights I was in as a kid. Just four because I was a coward. Yes, I would do just about anything to get out of a fight. But there were four times that my inner coward lost the battle.

Once the kid hit me good in the jaw. But I didn’t hit back. Just as in the song – “As bad as it hurt, I just grinned” – and after that first punch, it was over. I guess he didn’t know what to do with someone who doesn’t hit back.

I met the same kid a second time, just off school property after school, just as he challenged me to. He didn’t hit me that time. He said something about respecting me for showing up, and he let it drop.

The third time (I think I have these in chronological order) was a different kid, who also punched me in the jaw and broke his hand. I don’t know if it really broke, but he did go see the school nurse – either way, i like my memory’s version and I have no need to learn whether my jaw really was a fist-breaker or not.

The fourth time, I did run – but I will beg your forgiveness. The other boy did not try to hit me. Son a moved out of the way. He ran after me and tried to kick me. So I moved out of his way. Like this, he chased me around the school yard for about ten minutes before giving up. I actually recall him getting more and more frustrated and angry and I was finding it harder and harder not to laugh.

Kids have to learn to resist bullying, but so do adults. It’s worth watching some kids shows and learning from them. There are a lot of basic life lessons that many adults still need to learn, too.

This post was included in the Saturday Show & Tell – 8th Edition

Filed Under: Happiness Tagged With: ,

Working Your Self-protrait

March 26, 2011 by 1 Comment

“Every man’s work, whether it be literature or music or pictures or architecture or anything else, is always a portrait of himself.”

Samuel Butler one-ups the you-are-what-you-eat crowd, with his you-are-what-you-do idea.  Or at least, our portraits are what we do. But are these our most accurate portraits? Or are there other things, besides work, that better define us? That draw sharper lines? That paint clearer colors?

Abraham Harold Maslow came up with the term “self-actualization”.  He said, essentially that a painter has to paint.  That a cook has to cook.  That a pilot has to fly.  That we are what we do, that we are driven to do what we do.  But is “what we do” our careers?  Or is what we do the rest of the stuff?

I am a hiker, I must hike.  Well, I wish I could hike a lot more than I do, but I think that description defines me better than what I do for a living.  Is Samuel Butler’s “every man’s work” necessarily what he does for a living?  Maybe in a majority of cases it is.  Which is a sad statement.  Or maybe it is a happy statement, if it means people are doing what they really love.

What do you think?

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Your Mind Is What You Eat

March 24, 2011 by Leave a Comment

“Women who mostly ate junk and processed foods were more likely to have depression and exhibit increased psychological symptoms.”

So says  Dr Felice Jacka of Deakin University.  She  ran a research the study that tested more than 1000 women from a cross-section of Australian society, finding that those women who followed the national dietary guidelines were less likely to suffer from depression or anxiety.  No surprise – if you don’t get the basic nutrients you need to keep your body functioning properly, how can you expect your brain or your emotions to stay in balance.

The relationship between diet and mental health was strong, even stronger than the relationship between diet and

  • socio-economic status
  • obesity
  • illness
  • education
  • whether they smoked or not

The World Health Organization has identified 2020 as the year when depression is likely to become the second biggest cause of disability – after cardio-vascular disease.  In addition to all the other benefits of good nutrition, preventing an increase in depression has just been added to the list.  Why not take a few moments today at lest to review the basic health guidelines offered up by the government.  They are not very detailed, but following them is way, way better than not following them.

More from Deakin University

Filed Under: Fitness

The Pharmacist is Clowning Around

March 23, 2011 by 3 Comments

I would like to introduce you to Fang Li Yun, a 52-year-old Malaysian pharmacist of 24 years.  She is part of what they call the “Funny Action” project, which helps people learn to laugh and to smile even when there is no good news to smile about.

Like so many other people, Fang Li Yun thought happiness would follow her income, and as a pharmacist she was making good money.

But in 2006 she discovered clowning and discovered there was more happiness to be achieved.  This lead to a mission or pilgrimage of sorts with Hunter Doherty “Patch Adams” and a group of thirty other people from various countries to Mexico last year.  Together they visited patients, the homeless, the elderly, shut-ins and  HIV-infected people while dressed in their best clown attire

What made the biggest difference? In 2008, a friend of hers who was president of a breast cancer  support group, asked her this question: “The happiness a clown brings to people is only momentary. How are you going to make the happiness last?”

Now she teaches people how to laugh: “Everyone is born with the ability to laugh. Laughter is the best medicine and an effective way of fighting illnesses. Based on statistics, babies can laugh up to 400-500 times a day, while adults laugh an average of only 14 to 15 times a day.”

Fringe benefits of clowning around include increased self-confidence and reduced stress. Fang Li Yun discovered that whenever she focuses on making other people happy, she also experiences a surge of joy and forgets all her worries and cares.

And she is still a pharmacist.

This post was included in the That Girl Is Funny Blog Carnival.

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The Value of Value

March 18, 2011 by 4 Comments

I’ll spare you the long-winded intro today.  This is a short message by the former CEO of Coca Cola, very inspirational, that a friend shared with me a while back.  Take a moment to reflect on it, and hopefully your day will be a little more valuable afterward.

This post was featured in the Carnival of Wealth #31, in the Totally Money Carnival #12 and in Cajun Finances Random Thoughts Carnival.

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Five Animals Teach Us Less-wasteful Dining Habits

December 31, 2010 by 9 Comments

Feeling frugal?  Wondering how to save some money and time, while still eating healthy and helping the environment?  Here are five animals showing us ways to eat less wastefully, saving time and money, while helping our health and the environment.

The Fox
Saves: money, environment, health
Lesson: Buy direct from the source

By the time you buy a dozen eggs at the grocery store, they have been through several hands…and at least two weeks of handling, often three.  By the time you finish that last egg, it might already be four weeks old.  Not very fresh.

The fox goes straight to the source – the henhouse.  No middlemen adding extra prices.  No back-and-forth-between-between-companies transportation adding extra pollution.  No warehouse lay-overs reducing freshness.  In many cases, no (or less) chemicals and hormones polluting your meal.

Pretty foxy strategy.

The Giraffe
Saves: money
Lesson: Check for cheaper items

Stores always place in front of your face the items that yield the biggest profits.  These are the very things that a frugal-minded person least wants to be coaxed into buying.

The giraffe looks for less-obvious alternatives.  His long neck reaches for higher leaves and items tucked out of sight on the top shelves.

Always stretch your neck a little to see if you can find a less-costly option.

The Bear
Saves: money, time, environment
Lesson: Buy in bulk

Many people buy the same items week after week.  This makes sense for milk and eggs; they would spoil if you buy them months in advance.  But for many things, it makes no sense to make hundreds of trips to buy the same thing.

The bear shops bulk.  He doesn’t flit from flower to flower to collect honey; he waits for the bees to gather the nectar and churn out huge quantity of honey.  This way, the bear needs go only once to collect a huge amount of honey all at once.  When we do this, the item usually costs less, and we save time, money and pollution by reducing transportation.

Yeah – let someone else do the work.

READ ALSO: Three animals search high and low for a deal

READ ALSO: Get a $1000 Raise With Your Personal Fast Food Outlet

The Spider
Saves: money, time, environment, health
Lesson: Eat in

People seem to be eating out more and more.  But restaurant food is usually much more fat-laden, sugar-stuffed and salt-infused than food made at home.  It also costs much more.  And it often takes longer to eat, when you consider transportation time, preparation and the inevitable waiting-for-the-bill ritual.

The spider never eats out.  He waits for food to come to him, prepares it and devours it on the spot.  He saves time, money and the risk of getting squished by a boot.

Eat in and enjoy the privacy and the savings.

The Squirrel
Saves: money, time
Lesson:Buy when there’s a surplus

We buy things all year ’round, even things that could last quite a while. Apples and squashes are plentiful and cheap in the Fall, but keep well in a cool corner of the basement or garage for months.  Some items are overstocked after Christmas.  These are the times to buy.

The squirrel does most of his shopping when the nuts are plentiful, then stores them away to eat over the course of the winter.  This saves a lot of time that otherwise would be spent running around looking for food.

Why run from store to store, when the store can be right at home?

Filed Under: Frugal Tagged With: , ,
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