Our Happiness Level

I was listening to Hay House Radio yesterday, and the host was talking about how our happiness levels could be measured by averaging the happiness levels of our top few friends. I found this so interesting and also very eye opening.

It’s so important to surround ourselves with positive, emotionally healthy, and happy people. Because emotions and feelings are contagious (here is my previous post about this), it’s especially important and crucial for our own well being that we are cognizant of who we choose to be close to.

And I know that this isn’t always the easiest decision to make. Sometimes you’ll find that you’ve been friends with someone for years – you have a history that you would feel bad letting go of. And yet… every time you are with this friend you find that you start off in a happy mood (your mood), and you leave in a negative, sad mood (their mood). It’s crucial to your own happiness to carefully choose who you spend time with. If someone doesn’t help elevate your mood or make you feel great – it may be best to spend less time with them in the future.

And I’m not talking about a dear friend who has had a bad day and needs to vent (we’ve all been there). I’m talking about the person who continuously sees life through a darkened lens – who sees each experience through their negative filter. And while you may love them and want the best for them, you can also love yourself and want the best for your own well being and happiness.

rose colored glassesOn the positive side – think about your friends who radiate happiness. Think about how wonderful you feel after you spend time with them. Filling your life with people like this will actually help increase your own happiness!

And it doesn’t just have to be your friends – you can read positive books and blogs (like this one!), listen to inspirational podcasts, watch television shows that are happy and fun – anything you can think of to raise your own happiness level.

And in doing so, everyone who comes in contact with you will also have their own happiness levels raised.
It’s definitely worth thinking about. Your happiness is that important.

Jodi Chapman writes Soul Speak – a daily blog focusing on going within, being grateful, and living positively. She is the bestselling author of the Soulful Journals series – writing-prompt journals that help you go within and get to know yourself better. She is also the author of the upcoming book, Go For It: Get Out There and Start Living! She believes that our thoughts become our reality, and our actions lead us to our dreams. She is happily married to her best friend and co-writer, Dan Teck. They live in southern Oregon with their fuzzy kids. www.soulspeakbyjodi.com

Why Not Smile?

How does happiness affect the life of an individual? Happiness is the greatest feeling that everyone wants to feel each day. Are you confused on the techniques on how to share happiness with everyone? Well then, this article might help you.

SMILE! A simple act, but sometimes hard to give. When people are feeling joy and happiness, SMILE is present. Laughter follows within. Imagine the world when people are happy everyday. Chaos, sadness, sorrows, anger and other negative feelings surely have no place. One technique which is surely effective is having a sense of humor. A very simple, inexpensive and easy way. Crack some jokes, share fun stories and have fun. Anywhere is a good venue for it.

Problems are always part of every life and there is no way to avoid them. No matter what lifestyle or life status is, problems are always there. Every man or woman, single or married, child or adult, rich or poor, nobody is exempted from it. The best means to overcome problems is through great happiness without a cost.

No matter how tired and heavy feeling each person has, a simple joke and fun can take it away. Sharing jokes in a group of friends could possibly reduce the feeling of sadness, worry and sorrows too. Tell them happy stories or even share a comedy story. Let them share their own happy stories too. Create a topic and let everyone have a panel of comedy discussion. Facial expressions are also very useful. Be a joker or clown of the day. Have a passion to it. Sneak even a little time from them and surely they will never regret spending their little time cracking jokes and sharing happy stories in life. In fact they would forget the time and would never want to stop it. Seeing their faces with a big smile and laughter is the best gift each can give and share. And surely they will never want to miss a day without it. They would even remember it when they go home and sleep. It will continuously flash back in front of their happy faces, ending their day with a smile.

Family, friends and everyone is invited. These people are very important for it is them should be shared and not just for oneself. These people might have different trials encountered in life and the smile is surely what they have been waiting for. Show to them that no matter how hard the life is, be confident and tell them your secret to it. Smile! Live life to the fullest and never let the day pass without a simple smile. And surely everything follows.


About Author: This article is written by Sarah Hoekstra, who also writes for top-cleaners.com, a site featuring various reviews and tips on free computer clean up.

The Happiest Man On Earth: Matthieu Ricard

Matthieu Ricard was born in France in 1946. The son of famous French Philosopher Jean-François Revel and painter Yahne Le Toumelin, he grew up amongst the French elite.  He studied biology and had a promising career when, in 1972, after completing his doctoral thesis in molecular genetics, Ricard decided to forsake his scientific career to the practice of Tibetan Buddhism. He moved to the Tibetan Himalayas and has been living there since then.  Since 1989, he has been the French interpreter for HH the Dalai Lama.

He was nicknamed “the happiest man on earth”, after he participated in a study conducted by the University of Wisconsin that aimed at evaluating the level of happiness of individuals, amongst which were Buddhist monks.  The test that used 256 sensors attached to the skull, and three hours of continuous MRI scanning, showed that Ricard’s happiness level was far above all other participants. That same study also proved the neuroplasticity of the brain demonstrating that meditation can play a key role in anybody’s quest for happiness, by restructuring the brain’s neurons.

Ricard has written several books. Amongst others,  Happiness: A guide to developing life’s most important skill, in which he gives advice on how to live a happy life.  One of the most important aspect of his teachings is that, as you can train your body, he believes you can also train your mind. For that reason, happiness is a skill that everyone can develop.

For him, at the source of unhappiness, there are feelings of jealousy, anger, obsessive desire and arrogance.  Since all of these emotions are fleeting and transient, it is possible to prevent them from invading your mind and tormenting you.

How do you do that?  First,  by not responding to the emotion.  If you feed the emotion, it will most likely grow.  However, you cannot deny it either.  You need to look at the emotion and let it dissolve.   By repeatedly practicing that technique, he believes that negative emotions can flow through you “as a bird crosses the sky and disappears” and therefore not affect your wellbeing.

According to Ricard, behind every thought lies what he calls pure consciousness.  Through love, kindness, benevolence, selfless generosity and compassion, and obviously through the practice of meditation, it is possible to access that pure consciousness and flourish.

When speaking of happiness, Ricard refers to the Sanskrit word for this state of being: sukha.

“Sukha is the state of lasting well-being that manifests itself when we have freed ourselves of mental blindness and afflictive emotions. It is also the wisdom that allows us to see the world as it is, without veils or distortions. It is, finally, the joy of moving toward inner freedom and the loving-kindness that radiates toward others.”

The author is Alina Boutros, who owns a University Master’s Degree in Literary Studies, has been researching happiness for the past year. You can read her daily posts on http://alina-500daystohappiness.blogspot.com

Happy Families Stay Connected

My family enjoys our happiest times when we are sharing mutual interests. Being the mother of two teenage sons, it is up to me to try to stay up-to-date with their interests, because they sure aren’t going to make the effort with mine. However, I have found that not only did I become closer to my sons by doing this, I also broadened my horizons and truly enjoyed many of their favorite things.

Here are some of the things you can do to better connect with your family:

1. Watch their favorite television shows
This is one of the best things you can do. Because television series are continuing, this can lead to ongoing conversations that can last for months or even years. You might also discover some great TV series that you never would have tried (My family used to talk for hours on end about Lost). (See 20 Best TV Shows for Parent / Teen Bonding).

2. In addition to watching your teenagers favorite films, introduce them to classic films that they would enjoy
There are so many great teen movies from the eighties that your teens would love and so many classic movies from throughout the years that they are ready to see now. Even if they prefer to watch them with their friends, you can still have great discussions with your teens about the movies the next day. (See 75 Classic Movies Teens Should See ).

3. Share music and video games with Guitar Hero or Rock Band
The Guitar Hero and Rock Band series of video games have been one of the best games to ever bring parents and teenagers together. Many teens first discovered classic rock through these games. Later versions began including new rock songs, which parents could then learn. An entire family can play at once as different band members.

4. Share Young Adult Books with your teens, adults love many of them also
I’ve become a big fan. I devoured the Harry Potter and Twilight series and just read and couldn’t put down The Hunger Games series, the hot new series that is coming out with its first movie next year.

5. Communicate with your teens through the type of technology they prefer
Most teens prefer text messages to phone calls. They will more happily respond to you if you contact them by the method of their choice. (See Text Messaging with Your Teens ).

Guest blogger Jennifer Wagner is the creator and writer of the blog, Connect with your Teens through Pop Culture and Technology,  where you can keep up-to-date of TV, books, movies, music, gadgets, the Internet, websites, education , and all things teenage.

Wandering Mind, Unhappy State

Does your mind often wander off during the day? I know mine does.  I call it distraction, but I could also call it mind-wandering! That is why meditation is so hard for me. It seems like, no matter how hard I try not to have any, thoughts keep racing through my mind. Well, a study has shown that this characteristic of my personality might contribute to my unhappiness!

Matthew A. Killingsworth and Daniel T. Gilbert, two psychologists from Harvard University came up with the brilliant idea of using an IPhone application as the principal research tool for a study on happiness that was published last November in the Science Journal.

This iPhone application, created by Killingsworth, randomly asked 2,250 volunteers from all over the world at different intervals of the day what their level of happiness was, what they were doing and what they were thinking about.

Killingsworth and Gilbert found that people were happiest when making love, exercising, or engaging in conversation. They were least happy when resting, working, or using a home computer.

The results also showed that people’s minds wandered a lot, regardless of what they were doing: people reported letting their minds wander 46.9% of the time, and at least 30% of the time during every activity except having sex.

The study showed that mind-wandering was actually a predictor of people’s happiness more than the actual activities people were engaged in.

The researchers estimated that only 4.6 percent of a person’s happiness in a given moment was attributable to the specific activity he or she was doing, whereas whether or not a person was wandering determined about 10.8 percent of his or her happiness.

Many philosophical and psychological schools of thought, believe that happiness starts by living in the present moment.  Now, a study has shown the validity of that statement.  So, maybe when your mind wanders off while you’re in the middle of cooking, it is worth bringing it back to the task at hand.  It could make you happier… and, perhaps,  also prevent you from burning yourself or messing up the recipe!


The author is Alina Boutros, who owns a University Master’s Degree in Literary Studies, has been researching happiness for the past year. You can read her daily posts on http://alina-500daystohappiness.blogspot.com

Too Many Choices: Analysis By Paralysis

Have you ever been in a restaurant where the menu has six pages?  I find it impossible to make a decision.  Whatever I choose, I always end up wondering if I selected the best dish.  Most of the times, my husband laughs at my selection… he believes it often turns out to be the worst thing on the menu!  I hate to admit it, but he might be right!   When there are too many options, I don’t know what to have, so I resort to chicken, the safest, but most common and boring choice.

One thing is certain, our world offers people far more choice than before, no matter the field.  One hundred years ago, women, for instance, didn’t have the freedom and autonomy they now enjoy.  They got married as early as they could, they had children and raised them and they managed their homes.  Their life was drawn for them the minute they were born.   When people went to the movies, there was only one movie showing!  People had no choice!   In a way, it was simpler that way!

I’m certainly not suggesting going back to that period of time.  No woman I know wants to go back to the kitchen full time and have a life of servitude.  However, it is undeniable that this increase in freedom and choice came with a price!

In his 2004 book The Paradox of Choice: Why More is Less, Barry Schwartz talks about the fact that while individuals are now offered more freedom and choice, depression seems to be taking epidemic proportions.

Schwartz partly attributes that fact to the paralyzing effect of the infinite choice, which, according to him, is extremely exhausting to the human psyche.  It raises expectations (if you have many choices, one of them must be perfect) and it creates dissatisfaction (if you’re buying salad dressing and you’re not happy with your choice, it is easy to imagine the alternatives as being much better than your selection, so you end up unhappy about it).

Schwartz gives 11 ways to minimize stress caused by the debilitating effect of decision-making:

– choose when to choose

– be a chooser and not a picker

– satisfice more and maximize less

– think about the opportunity costs

– make decisions non reversible

– practice an attitude of gratitude

– regret less

– anticipate adaptation

– control expectations

– curtail social comparison

– learn to love constraints

I can completely relate to the fact that the abundance of choice can have a negative impact on happiness!  Probably, because it amplifies the myth that perfection exists.  We tend to believe that if there is such a wide selection, there must be a perfect choice!  The problem is there is no such a thing as the perfect job, the perfect time to have children, the perfect spouse, the perfect house or the perfect meal!  And when you take too much time to make a decision, you miss opportunities!

Analysis by paralysis…. that is what needs to be avoided when it comes to choices!   Choosing means being in motion,… but it has to be done with  no regret and no expectations!  And you always have to be ready to change direction if need be! At least, even if you slightly change your goals, you’ll always feel you’re going forward!


The author is Alina Boutros, who owns a University Master’s Degree in Literary Studies, has been researching happiness for the past year. You can read her daily posts on http://alina-500daystohappiness.blogspot.com

Living With A Bipolar Parent

First off I should say that my mother was never diagnosed as bipolar but looking back as an adult, lots of research, some basic education in psychology and after speaking to trained professionals I believe it’s a very accurate diagnosis. Your parents and family are meant to be there for you no matter what, they should support you and encourage you and you should always feel safe and protected by them but if you’re growing up with a family member who has any psychological or mental illness this is very rarely the case. You feel like you’re constantly walking on egg shells, you know they’ll be good days but at the same time you know they’ll be bad days too.

You can’t live your life around them

It’s not fair to live your whole life like you’re walking on egg shells but this is sometimes unavoidable. You know it can only take the smallest thing to trigger a storm but at the same time your home life needs to be somewhere you can relax. One thing I found helped was to have a kettle with some powder milk, tea, coffee and sugar in my room and a small box of snacks. Hiding away in your room shouldn’t have to be the answer but if this happens more often than not you need to make sure it’s as comfortable as possible. It’s their house too but there is a very large degree of irrationality to mental illnesses in that they’ll take it out any mood swings on the first thing they’ll see. If you’re not under their nose your life will be easier.

You need a release

No matter if it’s just a half an hour walk round your neighbourhood or you join a local club or activity group find something away from home and away from school that can take your mind off things even if it’s just for an hour or two a week. If you like listening to music really study it and learn to produce it yourself or dance to it. I was never fanatically into music but there were some songs that really had prominent lyrics to me that helped. Reading is also another good way to lose yourself for a few hours.

Look forwards not backwards

This is one I’ve learned with hindsight. Nothing is forever; you’ll grow up, move out and live your own life one day. For now it sucks and there’s a good chance tomorrow is going to suck too but next year or the year after it will get better. Find one thing you’re looking forward to that’s not too far away, going out with your friends, a holiday or even a shopping trip anything that you can concentrate on to take your mind off today. If you have nothing coming up over the next few weeks arrange something.

You can’t blame them for your life

This is one you need to learn as soon as possible and it took me a long time to learn and I’m still learning it today. You can storm around as a teenager and get away with it because ‘my mother never loved me’ but as an adult it’s quite pathetic. You are your own person, with your own personality and ultimately responsible for your own decisions and your own destiny. You might look at your friends who come from loving ‘conventional’ families but the chances are the majority of them have something they dislike about the way their parents raised them. If you want to get an education you can get an education, of course that’s easier said than done but it’s not impossible. My mother’s favourite quote was that I’d never amount to anything. I worked hard at several jobs and put myself through university. It wasn’t easy and I’m pretty sure I didn’t sleep for about three years but only a very weak forty year old says it’s their parent’s fault they never made anything of their life.

You can’t hold a grudge

This is another one I’m still leaning today. I don’t think I can ever forgive my mother for some of the things she told me growing up and I’ll have physical and mental scars from her for the rest of my life but as I’ve already mentioned only a very weak adult uses the past as an excuse for the present. There are some things that will be unforgivable but the majority of things need to be left in the past. Now I no longer live at home I have an OK relationship with my mother, it makes me sad that we couldn’t have this mother/daughter relationship when I needed it as a child but I’ll take what I can get now and leave the past in the past.


Jessica grew up to be a happy, well adjusted adult who lived happily ever after (so far) who works as an SEO for a home furniture company

5 Simple Tricks For a Happy Writer

Many writers find it hard to be happy in their jobs.  For most of them, it is their means to feed their mouths, put a roof over their heads, and pay their bills.  In other words, writing is reduced to being an obligation and not the craft they used to love.  Are you one of these writers?

Believe it or not, writing can be your source of joy and inspiration too.  it can be your means of venting out different feelings and stress.   You may be one of the writers who are currently experiencing a rough patch.

Don’t worry.  The road to happiness is just near.  Get through writer’s depression through the 5 simple tricks below:

  1. Read, read, and read. Reading works of other writers can and will inspire you to write and move others.  You can also acquire ideas for your post through reading.  Even skimming through posts in a newspaper can help too.

Reading can help expand your horizon so if you want something that’s in-depth, try reading books from authors like Ernest Hemingway or contemporaries from Paulo Coelho.  Pick anything that you like best.  It can be a piece or book that you have already read or something new.

  1. Write something that hits close to home. writing something that directly affects you is easier because you have emotions or feelings about the subject that you can use.  it’s just like pouring out your heart and soul to a diary or a close friend.

Or better yet, just tap on any subject that you want to discuss.  Come up with anything that interests you and write something about it.  this way, you are very eager to research about the subject and finish the article with ease because you are “into” the subject.

  1. Trust that you can do it. you will face many stumbling blocks in your writing career.  Editors, webmasters, or article directories will reject your articles.  Or you may be reprimanded by your boss for failing him.

Being a writer is tough.  But if you believe in yourself and what you can do, you will be able to pull this off.  Also remember that you will not appreciate success without failures.  It is normal to fail so enjoy it.

  1. Push yourself to the limits. All writers experience writer’s block.  This is inevitable.  If you find yourself in this position, stand up and take a break.  Inhale, exhale.  Relax and calm your mind.  Then go back to your monitor and start writing again.  Just type in anything.  You will find that creative juice will start to flow in no time.
  2. Be contented with your work. Most writers are never happy with themselves because they are never contented in their output.  I am guilty of this.  Very guilty.  I found out that this only stresses me out.  The point here is that we have to be forgiving of ourselves.  we berate ourselves because we want to give out the best or the perfect article that will impress or at least please everyone.  The truth is not everyone will find your article impressive because this is subjective.  The important thing is that, at the end of the day, you know that you did everything that you can to give the best output.

Writers, failing is inevitable.  This is completely normal.  What’s important is that you learn to stand up and forgive yourself.  Exercise the five tips in this post to keep yourself happy.

Good luck fellow writers!


Author’s bio: Marcy Gray is a writer who strives to reach out to other writers just like her. She also writes about baby care products such as the first years wave stroller and britax b ready stroller. She has been working in the baby care industry for three years now.

Summer of Happiness

There is nothing better than the first really warm day of the year that ushers in the presence of summer. Summer is the season that most everyone looks forward to all year long and it sometimes feels like it takes forever to arrive, but once it’s here, you never want it to go.

There is just something about summer that makes it the sweetest time of the year. From the warm heat to the fresh produce to the laid back feel in the air, summer is arguably the best time of the year.

One of the best advantages of this particular season is the incredible free time that comes along with it. The kids are out of school and the sun lingers around for longer to be enjoyed by all. There is so much happiness to be had in the simple pleasure of seeing kids out riding their bikes, playing at the pool or beach and enjoying popsicles.

Even if you’re not a kid, it is so important to get out there and be a kid again! It will boost your mood and is likely to throw a positive spin on your life outlook.

The warmer weather is an incredible mood-lifter and a fantastic excuse to get outside and enjoy life! The activities in summer are endless. From water sports to bike rides to hikes to lazy days at the pool, summer is a fantastic bounty of fun. In places that typically experience a harsh, dreary winter, summer represents an eagerly-anticipated freedom to get outside and enjoy life.

Summer’s amazing weather finally lets people get outside and enjoy the warmth of our precious sun and enjoy activities that the heat makes possible. Use a sports authority promo code to save on all of your summer outdoor equipment.

Winter and fall can be so melancholy because of the looming gray skies and torrential downpour, so when summer comes, even the way we cook changes. We throw more barbeques, more parties, and thus, our social lives improve. We are spending more time with people enjoying a fun activity, which leads to a greater satisfaction in life.

The more we can decrease our stress, invest in meaningful relationships and nourish our whole person, the healthier we will be, and summer is most definitely the best time for that!

 


Makayla loves to write and can be found writing about therapeutic boarding schools and distance learning universities, among other topics. When she is not writing, she is out running with her husband and two Rhodesian Ridgeback puppies.